Kuryakyn....is that Chinese for "poor quality"?

My old dogeared Webster paperback (yes an actual dictionary) defines "Panacea" as follows, "...n. a supposed cure for all problems". Uh ha. I'm thinking the good folks at Kuryakyn might want to go back to the drawing board when it comes to applying that moniker to their "trick" LED taillight/turn signal combo unit. I'm not sure what exactly it's curing, if anything; as mine's pretty much crapped out, after a lengthy seven whole months of service on Paint Shaker, my trusty '06 FLHRCI. I know, I know, what did I expect, that it would last forever!?

Panacea system has multiple modes, great when they work

Maybe I was asking too much, especially in light of my past experiences with "Big K's" offerings (more on that later), but the thought of bolting on a state of the art LED lighting unit, one that included a "blue dot"  (you hot rodders know what I'm talking about) and a retina searing taillight/turn signal brake light combo system that would up the odds that I would avoid the joy of an Escalade enema at the hands of Molly Multitasker, super soccer mom, was simply too much to resist. There's only one small problem. The build quality of the Panacea is so poor, that you really can't trust that its actually working. It's one thing if you can't depend on your brother-in-law, it's quite another if your brake light system takes an occasional, and altogether arbitrary powder. It could ruin your whole day.

And really, there's no excuse for it, electronics these days, at least quality stuff, is essentially bullet proof. If it works out of the box, you're good to go for years. There's simply no reason that I'm stuck taking my bike back to my dealer to deduce the failure. I'm lucky, I can roll my ride to McGuire's, and I know they'll sort it out right the first time, but many folks aren't as fortunate to have trusted mechanical help so close at hand, http://www.mcguire-hd.com/. And regardless, it's still a needless expense and hassle. I've already paid for the light once, thank you very much. 

So what you say, stuff fails all the time (Con-gress comes to mind) cut Kuryakyn some slack! Really? See, you might be right if this was an isolated incident, but it unfortunately this isn't my first rodeo with the metallic robot chick (you'll just have to trust me on that one). The Panacea lights are strike three.

Strike one on the Kuryakyn trail of tears (tortured metaphor, or brilliant turn of phrase, hmmmm!?) was a set of mirrors I bought for the CVO Springer. The design was clean and trick, which is just how they suck you in, and I thought they'd make a nifty upgrade from the rather vanilla stock units. Installation was pretty straight forward, no real issues. After a quick adjustment, off for a quick test ride. Everything was groovy, or so I thought. Sadly, it seemed that whenever the mph's exceeded 65, said mirrors would fold inward about 90 degrees, making it just a touch difficult to employ the rearviews as they were intended. Damn. Rode back to the garage, removed the mirrors, took them apart and tightened the "set" screw, as per the instructions. Back out on the road, and... Same result, folded like a busted john in Vegas. Working in the industry meant that returning defective product was no big deal, I didn't have to actually do the "dirty work" and the offending manufacturer always took the stuff back. I tried one more time with a fresh set of mirrors. You know what happened, so I won't even bore you. I will say the new HD units look great and work just dandy.

Strike two also involved the CVO Springer, this time in the form of a trick Kuryakyn axle mounted, curved license plate frame. I mean, what could possibly go wrong, right!? Flaking chrome for starters, right around the mounting screw holes. And if that weren't enough, the exposed areas quickly rusted!! This on a bike that's never seen rain, I mean it doesn't get wet when I clean the damn thing! It's my hot rod, my deuce coupe, it's pretty pampered. Well except for its crappy, rusted out license plate frame. Honestly.

So there it is, three Kuryakyn products, three pieces of crap. Baseball, life, California criminal code....whatever, no more chances. At least not from this jaded burn victim. It's sad enough that virtually nothing in the Kuryakyn catalog is made domestically, that's just a fact of life (one that we best be changing over the long haul), and many of their designs are truly well done, it's that their willingness to source quality factories in the workers paradise of the Peoples Republic is practically non-existent. The fact is, there are well made goods coming out of China, quality stuff, that performs exactly as advertised. The fact that Kuryakyn is unable, or unwilling to employ these factories is obvious and unforgivable. Too bad, I really wanna like their stuff.